The Art Of Seduction
By Sharon Jacobsen, Fri Dec 9th

Seduction is a question of subtle strategy with one ultimategoal - to have sex with someone.

The desire for sex is powerful; for some it can be as powerfulas the need to eat and breath. Seduction is the road we take toachieve sexual satisfaction.

While the ultimate goal is to have sex, there are lots ofsmaller goals that need to be reached along the road to thesexual surrender of our chosen partner.

For some, the thrill of seduction lies in the chase rather thanthe conquest. The excitement of wanting and pursuing someone cangive a sense of satisfaction in itself. For others, the electricthrill comes from knowing that another person's sexualattentions are focused on them. Those who thoroughly enjoy thechase are generally people with plenty of self-confidence andtheir confidence increases the likelihood of success.

Those who are less confident usually find seduction far moredifficult. How can you convince a member of the opposite sex tofancy you if you see yourself as being unattractive?

It's important that you choose the right person to seduce. Thisis more a matter of instinct than anything else but most of usendeavour to make conversation, or at least some eye contact,with a potential partner who we consider to be our equal on thescale of physical appeal.

Once you've sought out your 'prey' you need to decide whetherthe time and/or situation is right for seduction. If the objectof your passion is somebody you see on a regular basis, thetime/place being wrong may very well add to the thrill. Ifyou're getting the right feedback, the knowledge that the otherperson is interested but that you can't do anything about itjust yet can increase the feelings of arousal and excitement.

But how do you know that he's interested? The best clues comefrom reading body language. Non-verbal signals are far betterindicators of how a person feels about you than anything theymay actually say verbally. Those with an open posture areusually more available than those who stand with their

armscrossed. The eyes are the biggest give-away when it comes toseduction. If he returns your gaze, and especially if he holdseye contact with you longer than is usually acceptable, then thechances are you're on to a winner. Trust your instincts. You'll'feel' whether he's interested or not. Small gestures and toneof voice tell us a lot about how the other person feels aboutus.

Flirt. Did I really need to mention that? Flirting is used intwo ways. We flirt with others to remind our partner that westill need to be wooed by him, but when used for seduction, it'sa means of keeping the other person interested and aroused aswell as letting them know that they are unlikely to be rejected.Men, who are generally the pursuers, are highly dependent onwomen's signals to reassure them that they are 'onto something'.Playing hard-to-get isn't particularly attractive to men unlessyou're sending out enough signals to assure him that it reallyis just a game and that you are indeed 'gettable'. Let him knowthat the chase will most likely be worth it in the end.

Once you've made contact with him, you'll need to let him knowwhere the encounter is likely to be heading. People have verydifferent ideas of what sex should be so it's important that youboth know that you're looking for the same things. This doesn'tmean that you should just blurt out "I'm a dominatrix, how d'yafancy being whipped?" or anything else quite as obvious. You canif you really must, and you never know, it might just work, butin general the subtle approach is more likely to get you whatyou want. Men generally take the lead in this area, askingquestions and trying to access whether you'd make a satisfactorysex partner. Follow his lead. The questions probably won't bedirect (depending upon the man), but they will be based around'self-disclosure'. He tells you some, you tell him some. Peopletypically discuss sex in a light-hearted, abstract manner whenaccessing a potential partner, testing each other in anon-committal way.

Now that you're speaking you'll need to sustain his interest.Two people who've found each other through physical attractionmay not have the right chemistry to move along the road ofseduction once mouths have been opened. Look for signs ofacceptance or rejection. If you pick up on any signs ofrejection, don't waste your time on something that is veryunlikely to happen, no matter how much you fancy him. There areplenty more available males about just waiting to be seduced.

If you're still doing fine and the signals are good, it's timeto move onto the final yielding. One of you must surrender. Inall probability it will be you, because even if you initialisedthe seduction, he will probably have taken over the role ofpursuer somewhere along the line. The roles of 'hunter' and'prey' have been decided through thousands of years ofevolution, and usually fall naturally into place. Surrender andenjoy!

About the author:Sharon was born in East London but now lives in South Cheshire,England with her partner, also a writer, and however many of herthree children happen to be living at home at any given time. Tocontact Sharon, please visit her website at ahref="http://www.sharon-jacobsen.co.uk">www.sharon-jacobsen.co.uk